The Best Is Yet To Come

There’s something bittersweet about growing up and navigating true independence. Personally, I have never felt so anxious and excited at the same time. For the majority of my teenage years, I couldn’t wait to be an adult and have full autonomy over my life. I’ve always despised any type of authority or control over me, so being completely on my own sounded like heaven when I was sixteen. However, I don’t think I understood what being an adult really meant back then. I also didn’t realize how quickly it would happen. It was not until my 20th birthday that I began to feel a pit in my stomach about getting older. This may sound strange because I am still incredibly young, but all of a sudden my future wasn’t so far away.

 Everything feels so chaotic right now, and I’m unsure if it’s the time we live in or just the period of life I’m experiencing. In college, relationships in your life are constantly changing, while you are also having to deal with school, which directly relates to your future. On top of that, we are overwhelmed with the media telling us that the world is going to end and that no one in power is doing anything to help. The world is so loud that I can’t hear my own thoughts.  Lately I look around and I see how exhausted my peers are. Is this what being an adult is?

I know it’s not, but for now I feel trapped inside this weird transitional period. I’m not a kid anymore, but I don’t feel anywhere near being an actual grown up. It’s the anticipation of being fully on my own that scares me. The idea of actually graduating college and finding a job that will financially support me seems out of reach. I try to constantly remind myself to take it one day at a time. My thoughts and fears are overwhelming, and I know this is not a unique experience. I find comfort in knowing that I am not alone in these feelings and nearly everyone is a little lost in their twenties. At the end of the day, it’s alright to not have a concrete plan for the next five or ten years, but I do think it’s important to be optimistic about what the future holds. 

Right now, all I can do is focus on the present and work from there. Ever since I stopped regretting past decisions and dreading the future, I have found some peace. For most of my life, I haven’t been in control of my environment and it has led to a world of chaos. My favorite part of growing up is being able to control the things I allow into my life. I now have the power to make this existence enjoyable, and I will not take it for granted. I consider this to be my “trial and error” period, where I will do my best to learn and grow from previous mistakes. I still have that pit in my stomach, but it’s rooted in both anxiety and excitement. I have ambitions and goals that I hope to achieve one day, but I have no idea where I’ll be in the next four years. I think that uncertainty will fade a little over time, but for now I will learn to sit with that. There is no doubt that the best is yet to come.

Strike Out,

Written by: Zay Naeem

Edited by: Sarah Singleton

Graphic by: Emma Soefker