Getting My Groove Back
Image Courtesy: Pinterest
Don’t let the title mislead you. The groove I am referring to here is not my grown and sexy, stilettos on, freakum dress groove, but my ten-year-old bows in my hair, head in the sky groove.
I was recently scrolling through my camera roll while my assignment on a dwindling deadline stared me down, and I stumbled across a gem: a photo circa 2005. I was propped up on my mom’s hip, wearing a teeny floral summer dress, itty-bitty pigtails in my hair, baby hairs softly swooped and cat eye sunglasses. The cherry on top? My understated smile, giving “quiet confidence.” Was I two years old? Absolutely, but that did not detract from my captivating presence in the photo.
When I look beyond the bubblegum pink tint in my sunglass lenses, I see myself, but an unscathed, fearless version of myself. It reminds me of a time when my intrinsic value emerged from within me rather than from the frivolous things I attached myself to, like my academic success, accolades, and doors I was fortunate enough to walk through. Inevitably, as we grow older, we hang our hats on our achievements instead of our unique and intangible qualities. Significantly, as a college student, I always expand on my introduction beyond my name unpromptedly, seemingly to prove why I belong in that given room. Unlike little me, who knew she belonged, no explanation necessary. I want her spirit back.
Before, people who did not know me or care about me had a hand in determining my self-worth; It was shaped by those who love me the most, my family. It was a culmination of the overflowing affection and fangirl energy my parents wrapped me in. Reaching your inner child is just as much about looking inward as it is about circling back to the people who raised your little self and nurturing those relationships above those that are fleeting.
I try to read a page or two from my book of affirmations, “Heal. Grow. Love.,” by Pierre Alex Jeanty every morning, and this quote met my eyes as I turned the page this particular morning:
“The mirror misses your smile, That glow from your happiness. That freedom you had in your skin. The acceptance that swam in your eyes when you looked at it. Your mirror is calling your name, Your real name. Because it misses the real you. The true you—Finding your way back”
The ensuing question looms: How do I find my way back to myself?
Ask yourself, “What and who are you giving priority in your life?” Write your responses in order of importance, from your current state and then from the perspective of your inner child.
Are you one with the carefree you who came before you?
Strike Out,
Madison Brown
Editor: Grace Maneein
Athens