The Aftermath: Finding Yourself in Song Post-Breakup
Image Courtesy: Isabel Wilder
“Nothing wrong when a song ends in a minor key” – Werewolf, Fiona Apple
Sitting on his bed, across from a person that once felt like home, my heart had never felt so scathed, so stripped raw. I wiped some straggling tears off of my now makeup-free face and could only think of one thing: “Ouch – but damn if I’m not gonna make a killer playlist out of this.” I could not help but laugh at the fact that was my first thought post-break-up. That instinct was one of the surviving parts of me at my core, reminding myself that even if my power goes out, my emergency lights will stay on until I’m fixed again.
Despite the hopelessness that clouds a person recovering from a breakup, music serves as that space where one can experience a full range of emotions, like a good, warm hug when you need it most. Ever since that moment, I immediately took to my phone to play any song that could resonate with how I felt that day, my Apple Music has worked overtime to keep up with my musical needs. Looking around my room, the likes of Amy Winehouse, Mac Miller, Brent Faiyaz, Steve Lacy, Lauryn Hill, Faye Webster, and Briston Maroney filled me with an indescribable comfort that I would eventually heal, giving me permission to look forward and grow into my new skin.
Image Courtesy: Strike Magazine Tallahassee
Similarly, to how one can inexplicably become attracted to another person, I believe we all undergo the same with certain “soul songs;” these are the ones that get you jumping up and down in your seat or have you look out a car window longingly at the night lights. That song that you send to all your besties or post to your Stories, brightens your rough day when you least expect it to. It is when you finally peruse the lyrics that you have that click in your brain explaining that this happens because of how it currently relates to your life. Those soul songs slowly brought color back to me, so that I can smile knowing that they serve as the inner compass dictating who I’ll become next.
Image Courtesy: Cosmopolitan
Outside of whatever genre your ex liked or that song that TikTok says that you must listen to, tune out the noise; simply put on your headphones and discover the formative music that will dictate your new self. This year has had a beautiful resurgence in music experimentation, with Drake and Beyoncé dipping into house music, Bad Bunny dominating charts with his multi-genre album, and artists sampling from all over to bring universal sounds and emotions into today – so there is no excuse. Shuffle your discovery playlists and be open to new musical journeys, since you never know if you could be skipping your soon-to-be favorite song. Find confidence in the fact that you have the strength to love so freely and that you have always gone over every single one of life’s hurdles. Take pride in the fact that you have killer taste, and that people would be so lucky to experience you.
Image Courtesy: Apple Music
The playlist I made, “With You, I was the Flame,” is linked here. It is a 78-song ode to my experiences within my relationship and I hope you can comfort in the same songs I did.
Strike Out,
Writer: Isabel Wilder
Editor: Addy Crosby
Graphic Designers: Sydney Baksa & Isabel Wilder
Tallahassee