Self-Help for Self-Help Books
Self-help and advice books have had a resurgence in popularity over the past few years. I mean, when living amidst a pandemic, it is natural to look for some form of solace or advice in the chaos and uncertainty of life. I have picked up a couple of self-help and advice books myself; I find myself turning to these books when I feel like I am at a low and in need of advice from a higher power with infinite wisdom. When reading these books, I try to soak up every little anecdote and philosophical line in hopes that it will offer this great cosmic answer that will solve all of my problems and bring me this much-needed clarity. This hope rarely materializes. These books do, in fact, offer amazing tokens of wisdom, but I often find myself still stuck in the same mindset after reading. I find that much of what is said in the book does not apply exactly to my life.
I don’t think that self-help books are a waste of time or don’t offer great advice. But if you want to get the most out of this type of book, you need to approach it with a distinct mindset.
When beginning to read self-help texts it is important to maintain some form of self-awareness, especially with respect to the authorship of the book. Realizing that you and the author are not the same person—realizing that you do not have the same experiences and backgrounds—is important to keep in mind when reading. You must acknowledge the reason you are reading this book: because the author is not a carbon copy of yourself. If they were, there would be no purpose in reading the book at all.
It is critical to take every piece of advice with a grain of salt. Just because the advice is in print does not mean that it is the word of God. This fact can apply to any advice in life, whether it is in the form of a written text or not. Not all advice is good advice, and based on your current situation, you may find that some advice or help does not apply to your life whatsoever. You may not necessarily agree with the advice being given. That’s okay. Whether or not you take the advice that is given is completely up to you. With self-help books, you have the agency, the choice to accept and implement the advice or not.
The most recent advice book that I read was Dolly Alderton’s “Everything I Know About Love: A Memoir,” wherein she tells stories about her dating life and relationships with family and friends, as well as advice from these experiences and things that she wishes she knew. I was not able to relate to everything in the book, as I have never had my heart broken by a guru, but I have experienced heartbreak, in one form or another, and question my self-worth as Alderton did. Reading this book, while keeping in mind the context of my own life, helped me to internalize her advice better, and ultimately helped me to get more out of reading the book (which I highly recommend to everyone, especially young women in college).
I genuinely believe that self-help and advice books can be a great source of insight from an external perspective, but you can only get out of it as much as you put into it. Consider this article your sign to buy that self-help or advice book sitting in your Amazon cart. Once you do, hopefully these tips will help.
Strike Out,
Writer: Isabelle Grassel
Editors: Kimani Krienke, Natalie Daskal
Writing Director: David Kramer
Blog Director: Helenna Xu
Notre Dame