My Struggle with American versus South Asian Beauty Standards

Image Courtesy: EdTimes

As a second-generation Pakistani woman, I have had South Asian beauty standards imposed on me by my parents, grandparents, and Desi (South Asian descent) friends of mine my entire life. However, I grew up in America, where the definition of beauty contradicts what I overheard my family describe as attractive while I was growing up.

This left me feeling conflicted, as I wasn’t sure how I was “supposed” to look. If I adopted a more American style, my family would not only be disappointed in me for failing to embrace my culture but would also view me as less attractive. It made me feel like an outsider to my own flesh and blood. If I tried to dress in my cultural clothing and jewelry, I would stand out more. I wouldn’t fit in with my friends and would get judgmental looks from others, which left me feeling self-conscious.

The most common thing that I—as well as most other South Asians—often grew up hearing is that we should shield our skin from the sun to prevent us from getting “too tan.” Not only do South Asians revere fair skin, but also use it as the deciding factor for determining one’s level of attractiveness. Desis go through extreme measures to appear more fair-skinned, like piling on a foundation that is too light for their complexion and avoiding outdoor activities out of fear they will get a “darker” look. This problematic viewpoint is a consequence of standards imposed through British colonization during the 1800’s.

One particularly harmful result of this colonization is the popularity of skin-lightening products. Women commonly douse themselves in skin bleach, hoping it will help them achieve the “fair and lovely” complexion they desire. It is something even my mother used to partake in despite it having such dangerous effects: It increases the risk of skin cancer, causes rashes, and lets harmful chemicals like mercury absorb into your body.

Image Courtesy: HealthyWomen

I have never really understood why this beauty standard exists. Most Desis are born with such a beautiful, rich complexion that Westerners romanticize. Americans believe that a tan, sun-kissed look is best. They love to cover themselves in fake tan and spend hours at a time lying in the sun, hoping it will help them achieve even a slightly darker complexion.

Most South Asians also want to appear as “pure” as possible and achieve this by dressing in a reserved fashion. Desis believe showing too much skin will not only tarnish their reputation but, as South Asia has a communitive culture, will also reflect poorly on their whole family. To still appear glamorous with little skin showing, most people turn to eccentric outfits, decorating themselves with colorful patterns and tons of sparkly and flashy jewelry. This is a part of my culture I have always loved, as the garments I dress myself in for cultural occasions are always super detailed and captivating. Layering these intricate fabrics over my body makes me feel elegant, classy, and connected to my culture. It is a feeling I don’t really get when wearing American clothing, as Westerners tend to reserve extravagant outfits for special occasions. The daily “norm” here is more fitted, cropped clothing, such as jeans and a black tank top, and I much prefer the more maximalist style associated with my heritage.

Image Courtesy: Gundi Studios

Strike Out,

Writer: Zara Khan

Editor: Isabel Wilder

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