Losing Substance to be Social
We've all had those conversations that are so surface level that they create the feeling that we're losing substance to be social. Surely, there are instances when nodding, smiling, and being polite are necessary to life's safari ride, but in the wild (aka real life), we really shouldn't have to put up such a front.
Congregating to gossip at the bar when you simply do not want to be a part of tearing one girl down, to build another up — so faux pas. If you don't want to be that person, don't be that person. The tried and true Irish goodbye never hurt anyone. Refresh in the bathroom or get another drink, but don't subject yourself to petty talk.
Words hold weight, and they certainly fire deadly shots that will never be worth the game of finger guns. It's hardly a game to the person on the other side of the barrel. Kindness is your armor, and sometimes those around you are the ones that need protecting.
Oftentimes, how people speak about others is a projection of how they feel about themselves. So, take insults with a grain of salt, and don't compromise your value set to be an a-lister at your college bar. There is no social ladder worth climbing at the expense of others. Intrusive thoughts: impossible to avoid. Sure, I'll give you that. Saying them out loud: totally in your hands. Building your own confidence helps you find the courage to walk away from situations, especially in social settings, that morph your dialogue into one you're not proud of.
It's not easy being the first or only person to settle on higher ground. I'm not trying to sell you a lie saying it is, but I will say that the things worth doing will never be. Maybe you don't feel like it's "that deep," but don't ignore the pang in your stomach or static in your head. You honestly never know what somebody is going through, so give grace and speak kindly.
Hiding under the guise of alcohol to speak poorly about somebody or facilitate that mindless chatter makes you ugly. Stay pretty, girl. You're better than that, truly. Plus, real friends and the people you actually want in your life aren't standing in a circle playing "point and laugh."
If you feel you're losing your substance, you're not in the right crowd, and sometimes, solitude is better than being subject to stupidity.
Strike out,
Rosemary Aziz
Boca Raton
Rosemary Aziz is a Content Writer for Strike Magazine Boca. A health and wellness junkie who finds leisure in writing, all things coffee, and observing the human condition– but people-watching is better with friends. Or in her next article. You can reach her by email at r.m.aziz0204@gmail.com or on Instagram @rosemary.aziz.
