Leaning Into Your Feminine
Femininity is defined as qualities or attributes regarded as characteristic of women or girls. Femininity feels like dancing with your eyes closed—fast, vulnerable, and blanketed with sensitivity. It tastes like slightly burnt cinnamon rolls made with friends: sweet, bitter, and laced with intricate emotion.
Growing up, femininity looked like a little girl in a pink dress and tiara blowing out birthday candles, surrounded by smiling faces, feeling like a princess. Today, femininity looks like mini-skirts, bows in my hair, and swiping on layers of lip gloss before a night out listening to music with my friends—still a princess. However, this is not to say that femininity has only one look or style; this was simply my journey. If you identify as a woman, you are feminine by nature; it is who you are. Femininity cannot be stripped away from you, as it is at your core, tracing your every thought and breath.
Feminine qualities have often been criticized for being too much; women are too sensitive, too emotional, they care too much. Personally, I find it admirable that femininity is characterized by the ability to feel, the ability to laugh loudly, to bawl your eyes out at a movie, to be passionate in all things. Why is feeling to the heart's fullest extent a bad thing?
Femininity can look different for every individual; if you identify as a woman, whatever makes you feel feminine is feminine. Everyone can view it differently, and that is a good thing. Lately, I do not feel feminine. I feel like a zombie, performing my day-to-day tasks plagued by a cloud of dissociation, just floating through life. So how can I lean into femininity in the best way for me?
While I do not know all of the answers to the delicate state that is femininity, below is a list of what has helped me feel more feminine for the person I am.
Moving!! - This can be going to the gym, running, yoga, etc. When I make it a point to exercise, I feel much more in tune with my body and in turn, my mind. Moving and realizing I enjoy it has given me a new appreciation for how much my body is capable of, and it has proven to me that I can work towards a goal. My body is my friend not my enemy.
Getting ready for the day!! - I have recently gotten into the habit of wearing whatever and running out the door, but when I put forth the effort to get ready and wear clothes that I have styled, I feel much more like myself. I feel more like the girl I want to be, which leads me to take actions to be that girl.
Reading!! - After I have gone through a spell of reading a lot, I find that my mind is more creative. I have more vivid dreams, I daydream more, and I overall just have a more fresh perspective on my daily life. Reading allows me to break out of the normal day-to-day expectations of society and feel more like myself.
Spending time with the girls!! - This is arguably the most important one. Nothing makes me feel more feminine than spending time with my friends. There is a delicate bond that is formed within female friendships that is difficult to explain. It is like laying in a sun puddle; you are enveloped in warmth, allowed to just be without obligation.
You learn countless things through your friendships with women, and this in turn makes you a better woman. I am a reflection of the women I am surrounded by, the culmination of generations of women from all over the globe. The feminine experience of womanhood is shared by billions of people; there is always something to learn from someone. So, be open to meeting new people and look out for one another. In conclusion, be a girl’s girl.
Strike Out,
Writer: Kushi Zaver
Blog Editor: Sarah Singleton
Chattanooga
