Culture Fluidity: A Deep Dive into the Transition of Embracing Ethnicity

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Culture can completely shape an individual's self-concept and build on the foundation of one’s identity. Ethnic identity can thoroughly encapsulate the way we feel about not only our cultural background but even our distinctness in persona. Our ethnicity establishes the way we curate our connections concerning others both outside of our household and internal familial links. This impacts our growth as we try and establish our placement in our community aging into our cultural roots.

Coming from a Hispanic/Latinx background can shift not only how one sees oneself but also how one conducts oneself amongst an environment of individuals that are shaped by the American outlook. Having this duality in cultural values can be a double-edged sword, providing richness in perspective while also bringing confusion; an internal struggle of not feeling enough for either side. Growing up in an outside world with a culture that varied tremendously from the one in my household, put me through an identity crisis that shaped my relationship to my ethnicity.

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When most people hear about growing up in Miami, the first thing that pops up in their minds is the large Hispanic/Latinx population. While Miami is somewhat of a melting pot of heritages—an anomaly compared to a lot of other locations—there can still be a struggle to feel a connection within myself as I do not meet the expectations of what a Latina Woman is supposed to encompass, physically and in my mannerisms. Being from a Hispanic/Latinx background there is a standard that is placed on the ideal way to interact with one’s cultural values. Curating these expectations on how you are supposed to act and speak. Having a Brazilian cultural background but being white-passing, I constantly struggled not feeling Latin enough and also felt a little “too loud” for the more “Americanized” sanction of the community. While there are externally acknowledged privileges that come from being white-passing, I can’t deny the roots that have established the individual I've become. I would constantly be called “gringa,” and hear statements about how my parents were born in Brazil and I wasn't, causing me to invalidate my personal context. I began to feel as if I didn’t belong to my own identity. Confusion crept its way into my subconscious as I was surrounded by friends who were Hispanic and fit the standard where their identity wasn’t questioned or remarked on. I believed the false narrative that I didn’t fit into my ethnicity: I wasn’t that Brazilian bombshell, I wasn’t tan enough, I wasn’t curvy enough, I wasn’t enough for my culture.

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There is a societal tendency to continuously create expectations on the ideal ways a Hispanic/Latinx individual should act. By not meeting these stereotypes, one can feel this sense of disconnection between being authentic to the self but also desperately wanting to be accepted by these standards. This dissonance led my journey in exploring my Brazilian background to come to a complete halt. I felt too American for my culture but felt too Brazilian when I went to university. Floating in between identities. University served as a turning point, allowing me to alter how I reconciled and interpreted my cultural self-concept. Instead of feeling like a floater of cultures, I took hold of the notion that flexibility in my ethnic identity was not a limitation to who I could be. Instead, it serves as an aspect of myself that I have accepted not only for my present self but for my younger self who struggled to gain a grip on her identity.

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Culture is fluid and there isn’t a need to fit a certain mold of what a Brazilian-American or Hispanic/Latinx individual should be. I am a Brazilian-American based on my own experiences that have built the foundation of my being, whether it be making Bolo de Rolo (a Brazilian dessert from the state of Pernambuco), or Salpicão (a Brazilian mixed salad) with my mother while we dance to Latin Funk. The beauty in identity doesn’t necessarily have to come from conforming to what has been set as the benchmark for the culture. It stems from finding acceptance and reclaiming our identity being found in these diverse sets of influences. You don’t need to wait for this external validation to have a claim on how you take hold of your cultural origins. We compile this sense of identity within ourselves and take hold of our cultural persona because we don’t need to fit any mold to accept the prominence of our roots. We belong.           

Strike Out,

Author: Emily Montarroyos

Editor: Isabel Wilder

Tallahassee