Chivalry’s Never-Ending Funeral
Chivalry is DEAD! The famous cliché implies that romantic love and genuine gestures of moral affection have been mercilessly murdered by new types of love. In our modern era, we have diverted from traditional forms of expression, now utilizing new means to express the gradation of our feelings. This piece examines the jaded misuse of this cliché, which often glorifies a glamorized past while unfairly criticizing the present state of love and relationships.
The Oxford Dictionary defines chivalry as “the medieval knightly system with its religious, moral, and social code.” Knights, in their idealized form, are depicted as brave, noble, and loyal qualities that are highly attractive to a partner. Media portrayals of knights emphasize honor and virtue, creating an almost mythical, unattainable standard of love and devotion. However, I challenge the contemporary assertion that “chivalry is dead” and suggest we move beyond its influence. Historically, societal values were deeply rooted in rigid traditions, and romantic love often functioned more as a process than a profound emotion. Marriage, a traditional expression of love, was often arranged to preserve power and serve as social, economic, or political contracts. Is this truly the romantic, genuine love we aspire to?
Love is subjective, and America’s 50% divorce rate suggests that love was never as effortless as the past implies. Hindsight often makes the past seem more beautiful than it truly was, and I argue that each generation has proclaimed the death of chivalry in outrage since the concept first emerged. Chivalry may never truly die because it is something that never truly existed. The idea of chivalrous love has always been an illusion, an unrealistic standard that fails to account for the imperfections inherent in human relationships. How can we expect love to adhere to a fairy-tale narrative when love, in its very essence, lies in vulnerability and imperfection?
As society has evolved, so has our understanding of emotional complexity. We have become more attuned to our emotional needs in an era of unprecedented access to knowledge, self-awareness, and personal freedom. Our resources multiply, and love seems abundant and easily attained, yet many people are lonely. This awareness has complicated relationships, making love feel both more accessible and more elusive. As we grow more in touch with our feelings and attempt countlessly to fulfill our desires, it becomes harder to satisfy the insatiable parts of us. Like an addict, we hunt for that feeling of true, genuine love.
We are no longer bound by societal obligations to stay in relationships that do not fulfill us. Choosing who and how to love makes modern romance more authentic than past structured, duty-bound relationships. In this sense, the alleged “death” of chivalry is not a loss of our emotional innocence but a birth of freedom to love. Rather than mourning the loss of an idealized past, we should celebrate the culture we now have in our romantic lives. We no longer rely solely on grand gestures such as dowries and courtship but seek deep connection and understanding.
So, to those who lament the passing of chivalry, I say: stop trying to kill a ghost. Chivalry, as it is longing reminisced, never truly existed. What has replaced it is something far more profound: a love that embraces imperfection, choice, and emotional depth.
Strike Out,
Writer: Isabelle Kim
Editor: Dani Hernandez
Graphic Designer: Cole Martucci
Tallahassee